What comes to your mind when you see a well-built macho man shed tears as a way of expressing his emotions towards hurt or pain? It seems absurd and out-of-place right? I mean why should he show emotions, is he not meant to be a ‘man’?
In our milieu, there seems to be an unwritten code that does not permit a man to be expressive of his emotions. The only form of expression he his permitted to show his is physical capacity to do hard things. All forms of emotional display are meant for the women, while physical display are for the men. Things like ‘be a man’, ‘men don’t cry’ are common verbal expressions dished out to a man who is seen to express himself emotionally, both by women and fellow men. It is expedient for a man to man up in every situation, especially in a public setting.
In my honest opinion, this erroneous belief have led men to live a life less than normal. How? You may ask. Rather than being expressive, many a man look for other outlets to channel their emotions. For instance, those controlled by alcohol will find expression in drinking, those who indulge in violence will gleefully display manliness by engaging in domestic violence with those who are weaker than they are, amongst other vices.
The society will improve if there is a paradigm shift from this poisonous mindset, and a conscious change of attitude to men expressing themselves. Men are not less human, and every human has emotions. Emotions is a persons internal state of being, an involuntary response to an object or a situation based on or tied to a physical state and a sensory data.
It will be far from the truth to say men are like women in emotional expressions because of their make up. It will also deny the truth if we say men are void of emotions, let alone expressing the emotions. An expression of emotion is not conterminous to a show of weakness. It neither erodes a man’s physical attributes, nor makes him a weakling. Therefore, it will not be out-of-place to see a man put up a show of emotions.
I’d love to hear your thoughts on this matter. What do you think?
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