I had just resumed for the new academic session to primary two, and I was asked to repeat primary one because I was terrible in reading and writing. Actually, it was my mom who instigated my having to repeat a class. My spirit was dampened, and I suffered self-esteem issues. However, my story did not end there. My mom became my personal reading and writing tutor. I learnt how to read, write and speak good grammar for my level.
I’ve experienced other periods of failures in my life, and since I delayed in sharing my pain with anyone, I suffered alone. With this, I can confidently say I know what it is to be helped through the season of failure, and what it means to face your failure yourself.
Failure is not something anybody wishes for. It’s no one’s heart desire to fall into the pit of failing, but it is something that is inevitable in life. Someone once said, “if you never failed, it means you never tried anything new. The things that matter most when failure occurs is our attitude towards failure; whether we choose to rise, or we choose to remain which is the failure in itself.
Having this background understanding, how can you see your child through failure.
Let them understand that failure is not a person but a situation. There is a difference between I’m a failure and I failed. That your child failed in a particular endeavour does not certify him/her to be a failure. The only thing that makes one a failure is if one chooses to remain in the state of failing. With this, you can help your child throw away the bitter pill of failure and savour the sweetness of success.
Don’t rub in their failure. Doing this alone is like adding salt to injury. Perhaps that child is already suffering from bouts of poor self esteem and probably depression. Putting the weight of them failing makes the burden too heavy for them to bear and they might not rise up from that state of failure to a resounding success.
Failure is not fatal. Help them understand that even if they fall seven times, they can rise again. The only thing that makes their falling fatal is when they choose to remain in their failed state. If they quit at their first try because they failed, they will never have the opportunity of tasting what it means to achieve success. There are plethora of examples you can cite for them to drive home your point so you do not sound theoretical.
Prayer is the key. Know that except the Lord builds the house, they labour in vain that build it, and except the Lord keeps the city, the watchman watches but in vain. Committing your kids into the hands of God makes it easy for them to sail through any circumstance they find themselves. Make it a habit to pray for your children, pray over them and commit all of their endeavours into the hands of their Maker and Father. With this, your kids will be able to go through life on a more easy terrain and they’ll come back blessing you for it.
OVER TO YOU
Something you’ll want to add, let’s know in the comment box.