Hi, How are you today? I am hoping that this meets you in good health and in peace of mind.
So, today I want us to talk about something very important. This is one issue that needs to be addressed once and for all. Grab your cup of tea or water, anyone you will be comfortable with and let’s talk.
Have you noticed that when it comes to the subject of marriage, a lot of people have several funny beliefs that make it seem like the most of what happens in marriage has to do with two things which are; enduring the system and tolerating each other with each passing year. Then at every anniversary, be thankful that they have managed to survive together for another 365 days.
It starts with the mindset that makes most of the enjoyable part of marriage, in the early days and as time passes, ‘reality’ dawns on the individuals in that relationship. This wrong reality is largely society’s cooked up notions about what marriage should be like.
There is a lot of acceptance of the wrong things that have come to seem normal in marriages. If a man does a certain thing that displeases his wife, or that just isn’t right at all, the society says it is normal and that is what obtains in all marriages. If a woman also does something unhealthy that affects the relationship, this is also accepted as normal.
So, instead of addressing underlying issues to remove these ‘normal’ things that have never made marriages enjoyable, the society will prefer that the couple endure them. This has been passed down from generation to generation.
The funny thing is that those who take intentional steps to ensure that those unhealthy things are not prevalent in their own marriages are seen as the abnormal ones—doing too much or faking the happiness that the marriage has been able to give the two people involved.
Marriage is not meant to be endured. It is meant to be enjoyed completely. A lot of factors bring about this enjoyment and if you can seek the knowledge that will help bring about this as well as the wisdom to apply it, it will help you in a lot of ways: first on how to make the right choice of a life partner if you are single, then how to have the marriage of your dreams and understand that that can only be achieved not by the expectations you have of the other person, but by what you have to give to the relationship and what the other person also has to give.
Don’t go into marriage with the mindset of enduring it after a period of time. Go into it with the mindset of working daily at getting the best from your marriage. The media only shows a lot more relationships that are going through bad experiences hereby making it look like the rest of the people who don’t make it to such news are enduring and patching things up to make the marriage survive at least.
A marriage can’t be enjoyable by itself or just because it is made up of two knowledgeable people. It can only be so because there are two intentional people, two doers and two people ready to live out the marriage just like God intended.
I hope that your mindset is a lot more positive about the subject of marriage going forward and that you take intentional steps towards making it an enjoyable experience for you.
Best wishes in all your endeavours.
Written by: Juliet Ambali