“Song of Solomon 1:6 Look not upon me, because I am black, because the sun hath looked upon me: my mother’s children were angry with me; they made me the keeper of the vineyards; but mine own vineyard have I not kept.”

Some weeks back, I was invited over to speak on taking spiritual responsibility for your marriage/relationship at a church programme. In other words, taking responsibility for tending your own marriage garden. 

A relationship leading to marriage or marriage itself is like a garden that needs to be tended with diligence, and it takes a whole lot of effort to make sure it doesn’t grow wild. Some people are pros in keeping watch of other’s relationship looking at what they have not done and what they should do, yet their relationship is rotting away. 

In taking responsibility for your relationship, there are certain things you have to do, but for the purpose of this post, I’ll highlight 4 responsibilities you have towards your marriage. 

1. The first responsibility we have towards our love relationship as Christians is giving our relationship over to God. We do not choose whom we are to marry of ourselves; either by sight or by our carnal knowledge, but by absolute reliance on God. “Proverbs 3:6 In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths.” 

2. Flee lust/avoid fornication. “Hebrews 13:4 Marriage is honourable in all, and the bed undefiled: but whoremongers and adulterers God will judge.” There’s this thrilling feeling you have when you’re with someone you love. It’s perfectly normal and it shows you’re attracted to the person you’re engaged to. However, how do we relate in purity towards your partner? Some people get carried away by their emotions they fall into sin. Some believe that since they are getting married they can indulge in necking, kissing, and outright sex. We’re commanded by God to flee every appearance of evil. “I adjure you, O daughters of Jerusalem, by the gazelles or by the hinds of the field that you stir not up nor awaken love until it pleases.” SOS 3:5 (AMP). 

3. Read Christian books on marriage. “Hosea 4:6a My people are destroyed for lack of knowledge.” Marriage should not be handled with kid’s gloves. With the skyrocketing rate of divorce, and the sad narratives being propagated about marriage, it is necessary we are armed with the right knowledge. Homes are not built in ignorance. Many things propagated by the society are antithetical to what the Bible says. Apart from reading godly literatures, dig into scriptures to know God’s mind on marriage. Ephesians 5:22-25,28,29, 1 Corinthians 7:1-5. Some little issues that lead to great problems could have been avoided if the parties involved had the right knowledge.

4. Prayer. The greatest responsibility of a believer is prayer. A prayerless Christian is a powerless Christian, and this is applicable to love relationships. Battles are fought and one on bended knees. Homes are moulded and built on bended knees. Conflicts and disagreements are first settled on bended knees.  Take up your responsibility of praying for your home now. It’s not too early to pray, neither is it too late to pray. Pray without ceasing. Look into scriptures and pray for your marriage. 

Anything you want to add? Do so in the comment section.  😘