This is one topic I cannot stop talking about. I made a video about it some time ago. You can watch it here.

Yes, I’ll keep talking about it because this issue keeps coming up. People have different perspective on this issue, and I’m not one to tell you how to spend your money or manage your family finances, but I think I can offer some insights.

So, I’m sure we know the popular aphorism, “His money is our money, and her money is her money.” Why not let us make it “his money or her money is our money.”

his money or her money is our money Click To Tweet

I attended a Family Building class hosted by Mrs. Juliet Ambali in 2019, and she made an illustration that gives life to the somewhat unpopular idea I want to share. I won’t be using the exact figures she used. It’s been almost two years. She said, “If your spouse has 2,000 Naira in their account, and you have 3,000 Naira, how much do you really have?” If we look at it from the angle of the prevalent mindset, the man will have his 2,000 Naira, while the woman can claim to have 5,000 Naira because her husband’s money has become her money. However, where both his money and her money belongs to both of them, they both have 5,000 Naira. Enough to go round, right?

I’m not saying you and your spouse have to split the bill halfway to show that you both are financially responsible for your home. That’s another post in this series you should be watching out for. What I’m saying is that you should not carry on a selfish mentality that puts the financial burden on one party—usually the husband, while you go about with what you call your own money.

The two shall become one flesh, not only in body, but in money matters too. Click To Tweet

If you see you and your partner as one, it will reflect in your mindset about your finances. The two shall become one flesh, not only in body, but in money matters too. It’s unfair to let one person carry all the load when two of you should be sharing the weight. If your excuse is that is how it is done in the society, you’re wrong. The society should not define how you run your home. Popular beliefs should not do so too. Rather, do what works for both of you and what makes both of you comfortable, and to thyself, be true and fair.

The society should not define how you run your home. Popular beliefs should not do so too. Click To Tweet

With love,

Oluwakemi.